10.09.2009

an apparition

two days free of the day job since i got home from decibel festival, and boogers are my life and my bed is my prison.

a full time retail job would create a split personality disorder of even the brightest and most authentic human beings. i get a queasy feeling that i cannot discern the me i am in the company of my friends and family from the placating me i am not really (i hope) in the company of strangers with whom i have shared the briefest interactions. does this mean i am genuine to all, or disingenuine to all if i treat all people the same? i need more ways by which i can distinguish myself from that self.

sometimes i feel like i am a sound bite, one those fragments of audio and visual that pass for news in our bleeding culture of disinformation.

i made a move on catching up with significant films i have missed over the last few years.


the color was beautiful. as evan pointed out, by omitting a soundtrack, the film requires you to interpret your feelings for each scene, instead of them being determined for you by queuing some music. this anomalous feature of the film was so terrifying i had to stop and start it 4 times over the course of two days. i'm glad i finished it.

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